top of page
  • Writer's pictureMuzammil Hussain

Control Emotions - Can we or should we?

We often hear and say to others "Be Strong", "Don't worry, it is just a phase", "Ignore it, look at the brighter side". Agreed that these statements are made in all good faith.

But I take a pause, and question - Really? Can I be strong when I am sad? Can I just ignore it? Or can I not worry? And I get an answer to all of these - NO, do not lie to yourself, buddy.

It is an irony that when we are happy, we remember the factors that brought it, we tell stories, we cherish memories, but when we are sad, most of the time we suppress the stories behind it and even the feeling of sadness. I feel and many of you would agree that all emotions, happy or sad, should come out. We use emoticons in WhatsApp to express. Emotions exist to be expressed, let them flow. In my opinion, Emotions are like a channel or the banks of a river that defines its own path, within the boundaries of which flows your story of life. Hidden within these stories and events is you, and when you try to find “yourself”, it is called Introspection. Let the river flow freely. Please do not make it a dam and restrict the flow, as this would someday lead to a huge outburst and possibly break you.

I feel that one should not control emotions, instead, learn how to assess them; because every emotion - instant happiness or sadness, cheerful memories, or accumulated sorrow is one of the best means to introspect. When you backtrack the events that led to a certain emotional state, at each step you would find certain characteristics of yourself, good or bad - and this is introspection - knowing your inner self, without the need of external validation.

For example - you got an appreciation at work, you come home happy, you are not tired (surprising), the meal tasted better than other days, you chat with family or friend(s). The chain of events started with an appreciation. If you assess it, you would find the factor that made you perform well. Identify, remember and harness that factor - what better introspection can you have!

Another example - you quarreled at home and left for work, you found the meeting boring, could not complete your task, did not feel hungry enough, even a smoke did not feel relaxing as always. If you assess it without bias, you would find a possible flaw in yourself that led to the argument. Or it can be even so that something else from the past triggered that argument. Try to see through each event and identify flaw(s). Of course, the next step would be to try and stay away from them, and not spoil another day. But, even after an unbiased assessment if you did not find a flaw, then so be it - do not be sad, you have been right all the time.

The point I am trying to make is that emotions are channels to our inner self. So, instead of blocking them, or taking them for granted, let us try to go through them, immerse ourselves into them. In a neutral state of mind, we need to think, imagine and re-create certain events in our minds to introspect. But, when we are in an emotional state, we are already there, no need to re-create anything, just try to read through. I believe this would be the best way to know yourself - Introspect.

32 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page